When Does Loyalty Stop Helping the Team?
Early in my fire service career, I worked for a lieutenant who didn't believe much in training. I was new, I knew there were things I needed to learn, and I asked to train. It didn't happen. I studied on my own, practiced what I could, and learned from another member of the team who was willing to help me. But there were limits to what I could teach myself.
Eventually, that lack of preparation caught up with us. We went into a fire together, my lieutenant left me, and I nearly died. I was angry, and I reacted emotionally at the scene. But after I had some time to sit with what happened, I realized I had a decision to make. I could keep trying to deal with the situation myself, or I could take it to someone who had the authority to do something about it.
That meant going to the Chief.
At the time, that felt a lot like snitching. Today, I see it very differently.
Team Loyalty Isn't the Same as Staying Silent
The lieutenant wasn't my friend. He was my superior, and quite frankly, he wasn't a particularly nice person. My hesitation about going to the Chief wasn't because I was worried about betraying a friendship. I thought I should have been able to handle the situation myself.
There was also something else at work. In the fire service, the bond between people on a crew is hard to explain unless you've experienced it. You depend on one another in situations where mistakes can have serious consequences. You are each other's last line of defense. There is a bond that develops when you put it all on the line together and come out the other side successfully.
Going outside that group felt wrong to me, but staying silent wasn't going to make me better prepared for the next fire. It wasn't going to change a lieutenant who refused to train. And it certainly wasn't going to make our team safer, so I went to headquarters and talked to the Chief.
He listened. He moved me to another shift with a different lieutenant who was willing to train and do the work. I got the opportunity I needed to develop, and I learned something about loyalty that has stayed with me throughout my leadership career.
Team Loyalty Has to Serve the Team
When I was younger, I probably would have described loyalty as "ride or die." You stand by your people. You protect your people. You don't go outside the group when there's a problem.
I've changed my thinking about that.
I still believe loyalty matters. I believe strongly in having your team's back. But loyalty can only take you so far when the wants of one are put above the needs of the team. That's where loyalty starts working against you.
You don't have to work in a fire department for that to happen. It happens in offices, banks, hospitals, manufacturing facilities, small businesses, and just about anywhere people work together. One person doesn't want to follow a process. Someone doesn't want to do their share of the work. A longtime employee is allowed to behave differently because "that's just how they are." A strong performer gets away with behavior everyone else is expected to correct.
Sometimes the rest of the team stays quiet because they don't want to create conflict. Sometimes the leader allows it because dealing with the problem is uncomfortable. And sometimes we call that loyalty. It isn't.
Good Team Loyalty Requires Responsibility
A good team isn't one where everybody protects everybody else regardless of what happens. It's a group of people who understand that their individual choices affect everyone around them.
That was especially obvious in the fire service because the consequences could be immediate. If someone wasn't prepared, didn't train, or didn't do their job, somebody else could get hurt. But the principle isn't really different in another workplace. The consequences just look different.
If one person continually misses deadlines, someone else picks up the work. If one person refuses to follow a process, someone else deals with the consequences. If one person's behavior is continually excused, the rest of the team learns something about what the organization actually values. That's why leaders have to look beyond what one person wants and consider what the team needs.
There will be times when supporting an individual is exactly what the team needs. People need coaching, patience, second chances, development, and leaders who are willing to stand beside them while they grow, but supporting one person should not require everyone else to continually pay the price.
Team Loyalty Means Rowing in the Same Direction
Looking back, I don't believe going to the Chief meant I failed to handle the situation myself. I had tried to learn. I had asked for training. I had done what I could on my own. Eventually, I reached a point where continuing to handle it myself wasn't going to solve the problem.
That was something I had to learn about leadership, too. You can be loyal to people without protecting behavior that hurts the team. You can support an individual without allowing their wants to become more important than everyone else's needs. And sometimes doing what's right for the team means having a conversation or making a decision that doesn't feel particularly loyal in the moment.
A team works when people are rowing in the same direction. Leadership requires us to pay attention when someone isn't and to be willing to do something about it. That's not a lack of loyalty. Sometimes it's the most loyal thing you can do for the team.
If you're working through the everyday challenges of building stronger teams and leading people well, our Leadership Library includes practical microlearning workbooks designed to help you put leadership concepts into action.
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